Friday, December 16, 2011

STAR of Paroi - The Hallowed Turf

recently global virus epidemic that reduces the IQ points of female teenagers by several bajillion celebrity Justine Bieber went to Stamford Bridge for a kickaround. not only did it pollute the pitch, it also disrespected the players who are way older and more experienced than it
this got me thinking, what if it came to STAR of Paroi? better yet, what if some douchebags came to STAR of Paroi? what would I do to them? here's a list I came up with

Justine Bieber - launch into a two-footed tackle on it. the stamp its head while it's down, crying
George W Bush - slide tackle, hit my studs to his nuts
whichever Kardashian that had a short marriage - eat 'Roller Coaster' while wearing a Kris Humphreys jersey
Lewis Hamilton - karate-kick his back after getting myself launched by Felipe Massa
Mario Balotelli - distract him with fireworks and Maseratis before giving him a nerve pinch
the linesman that cost us a win against Newcastle - get a pair of glasses and focus the Sun's rays into his eyes
the 'untouchable' footballer - all punishments against Bieber, Bush and Hamilton combined

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