no love for Anders?

FERGIE Y U NO LET ANDERS KEEP GOAL???

Bruno Saturn is now Bruno Mustafar

due to possible confusion between our Bruno and an actual 'Bruno Saturn', we are glad to announce that our Bruno has legally changed his name to 'Bruno Mustafar', after that volcanic planet on Star Wars that saw Obi-Wan and Anakin battle it out

in other news, this is a REALLY slow news day. kthxbai

The Golden Skateboards Award 2011 - Behind the Scenes

Ever wondered what goes on behind the scenes of this prestigious award? Today, you'll be able to discover the passion, the spirit, the professionalism and the togetherness of the awards team that enabled them to make Skaties 2011 a bigger success than last year

May this continue for the future. But right now, here are the behind-the-scenes pictures, captured by our own cameramen, who by the way don't earn a cent slaving for us

it was all hard work from day one

 a lot of research and tallying up were done

it did take it's toll on us

some affected worse than others

we even worked late into the night

up to the point where we were just mucking about

and totally forgetting the awards altogether

 but in the end we pulled together

it was tiring, for sure

heck, we never even left the building for a few days

but in the end, we all celebrated success

so we can make sure that this award is a huge success

A big thanks to all members of the team who made this all possible. And remember all the takeouts? You guys owe me for that

The Golden Skateboards Award 2011

Hello all, we are back the 2011 edition of the Skaties! Last year's inaugural edition saw many first-time winners walking away with this prestigious award. For those who are new to this, this award honours (in some cases, dishonours) those who have accomplished great things in the past year. Each winner gets to take home a, yep, you guessed it, a golden skateboard.

Above is the prestigious Skatie that each winner gets to take home with them. This year, each Skatie is laced with adamantium so that it won't be melted down and sold to pawn shops, as some of our winners did last year. We've also planted GPS trackers in each trophy in case they go missing, and the winners can trace them

Each year, five candidates are chosen for each category, and the public must vote for who they think deserves the award the most. As previously mentioned, this award may or may not be a good thing for the winners

Right, let's move on to the categories, candidates and winners

Man of the Year

Candidates

Steve Jobs

Barack Obama

Najib Razak

Dalai Lama

Mario Balotelli

Winner

Mario Balotelli - who else can go from throwing darts at youth players one day, to helping a kid confront his bully at school the next? Can Obama do that? Or even Jobs? No, didn't think so either. Although Steve Jobs might have created an app for it

Controversy of the Year

Candidates

Tevez not playing

Englishgate

Trialgate

Osama's 'death'

Davis' Family Vacation

Winner

Englishgate - this incident brought the 5 Muzaffarians together and bound stronger as a result

Comeback of the Year

Candidates

Man United vs Man City (Community Shield)

Man United's unbeaten league run since THAT thrashing

Avril Lavigne with new hits

The NBA actually starting

Tony Stewart

Winner

The NBA actually starting - some of us have resigned to transferring to China to watch the CBL, and even contemplated going to Italy just to see Kobe Bryant play. But now the NBA is back! All hail capitalism!

Fanboys of the Year

Candidates

Call of Duty fanboys

Assassin's Creed fanboys

Skyrim fanboys

Battlefield fanboys

Mario Kart fanboys

Winner

Battlefield fanboys - an obvious choice. For who else can say their game is a bajillion times better than Call of Duty - despite neither game being out when the debate began? We totally see the logic there, BF fanboys

Footballer of the Year

Candidates

Cristiano Ronaldo

Wayne Rooney

That guy who plays somewhere in Samoa

Luis Suarez

Me

Winner

Luis Suarez - a wholesome figure, he is a good role model for children everywhere. You will never see him bite someone in the shoulder, using his hands to stop a goal and using a racist word towards other playe...what's that? 8-game ban? For racism? Oi, get back here you numpty!

Villain of the Year

Candidates

Every other US soldier

Justine Bieber

Anwar Ibrahim

Vladimir Makarov

Grayson Chan

Winner

Justine Bieber - who else can polarise the world and basically separate all humanity into 2 groups? This person is clearly more dangerous than Magneto, Dr Doom, Makarov, Joker, Lex Luthor and Anwar combined!

Blogger of the Year

Candidates

Firdaus

Azzally

Sarah

Hisan

Izham

Winner

Sarah - she's the only one who's been updating her blog, so this was an easy decision. Get on that keyboard, you slackers!

Tweeter of the Year

Candidates

Rio Ferdinand

Michael Owen

Firdaus

Hisan

Tim Le Cat

Winner

Tim Le Cat - Tim's a tweeting cat. Clearly the winner here

RayBan Model of the Year

Candidates

Firdaus

Saiful

Izham

Fitri

Kishon

Winner

Firdaus - totally pulling off the male-model look. Now can you please get that hidden blade out of my face?

And that concludes this year's Golden Skateboards Award. If you have any suggestions for any future awards, or think that your favourite should have won, feel free to leave a comment on this post or in the shoutbox. It won't change the results, but at least you will feel better

Don't forget to pick up a can of Pringles on your way out, prepared exclusively by our sponsors for this year. Just ask for your favourite flavour!

Until we meet again

------------------------------------

LATE ENTRY!!!

Due to popular demand, a new category has been added yesterday. Voting ended at 2200 Malaysian time last night, and these are the results

A-Hole of the Year

Candidates

That British guy

Kyle Busch

Kurt Busch

Lewis Hamilton

That other British guy

Winner

That British guy - for successfully setting me back a few more years with his recent antics. I took most of my life at high school to do it, but he's managed to undo it all in less than a year. He could win the 'Douchebag of the Year' award as well if we had held it this year

teaser

Bruno Saturn - It Will Hail

If you ever sue me, baby,
Leave some lawyers at my door
'Cause it would take a whole lot of subpoenas
To realize what banks we used to rob,
We don't rob them anymore

There's no injunction that could save me
No matter how long before Torres will score
So keep in mind all the human sacrifices I'm makin'
To keep you from suing me
To keep you from walkin' out the door (with my cash)

'Cause there'll be no sunshine
If I lose this case, baby
There'll be no clear skies
If I lose this case, baby
Just like the clouds
My lawyers will do the same, if you win the case
Everyday, it'll hail, hail, hail

I'll never be the judge's favorite
Your witnesses can't even look me in the eye
Ooh, if I was in their shoes, I won't be doing the same thing
Sayin' "There goes my client
Walkin' with that criminalish guy"

But they just hate me from day one
Ooh, is it because I'm not that Bieber creature?
Yeah for them I'll try I'll try I'll try
The Bieber creature can insult Islam and get away with it
And it makes me wonder why?

'Cause there'll be no sunshine
If I lose this case, baby
There'll be no clear skies
If I lose this case, baby
Just like the clouds
My lawyers will do the same, if you win the case
Everyday, it'll hail, hail, hail

Don't just say guilty,
Don't just say guilty
At least tell me what I did wrong
So I can blame the government

'Cause there'll be no sunshine
If I lose this case, baby
There'll be no clear skies
If I lose this case, baby
Just like the clouds
My lawyers will do the same, if you win the case
Everyday, it'll hail, hail, hail

STAR of Paroi - The Hallowed Turf

recently global virus epidemic that reduces the IQ points of female teenagers by several bajillion celebrity Justine Bieber went to Stamford Bridge for a kickaround. not only did it pollute the pitch, it also disrespected the players who are way older and more experienced than it

this got me thinking, what if it came to STAR of Paroi? better yet, what if some douchebags came to STAR of Paroi? what would I do to them? here's a list I came up with

Justine Bieber - launch into a two-footed tackle on it. the stamp its head while it's down, crying

George W Bush - slide tackle, hit my studs to his nuts

whichever Kardashian that had a short marriage - eat 'Roller Coaster' while wearing a Kris Humphreys jersey

Lewis Hamilton - karate-kick his back after getting myself launched by Felipe Massa

Mario Balotelli - distract him with fireworks and Maseratis before giving him a nerve pinch

the linesman that cost us a win against Newcastle - get a pair of glasses and focus the Sun's rays into his eyes

the 'untouchable' footballer - all punishments against Bieber, Bush and Hamilton combined

Fenomena Nazmi

biasa la kan, bila satu team ni menang, mesti ada star dengan rising star kan? untuk skuad Harimau Malaya yang menang emas kat Indonesia hari tu, rising star berkenaan ialah Nazmi Faiz. mana taknya, umur baru 17 tapi dah bagus kawal midfield

lepas tu bila Kelayakan Olimpik, dia dapat skor gol paling cantik aku pernah tengok budak umur 17 tahun skor lawan Lebanon (sayang kita kalah 3-2). gol tu pun terpilih sebagai gol terbaik mingguan kat www.101greatgoals.com

tapi kita pun maklum la kan, orang Malaysia ni ramai kena penyakit HD. bukan hi-definition, tapi Hasad Dengki. tak caya? tengok screenshot bawah ni (kredit kepada pengamibl screenshot ni)

klik gambar kalau tak nampak

meh la aku counter point-point dia :

- kau rasa biasa je. ok, tu pandangan kau. tapi tolong bagitau, pemain mana lagi yang umur 17 tahun kat Malaysia ni boleh kata dia menang emas Sukan SEA?

- tunjuk belang kat senior? bukan ke dia yang antara paling rajin masa Sukan SEA dulu? pemain senior pun kagum dengan dia

-football is a team sport

-ni bukan asrama nak buli sana buli sini (ada buli lagi ke kat asrama?)

- memang la gol dia tak diiktiraf FIFA, jenuh la diorang nak tengok semua gol tiap-tiap minggu. perhatian, gol tu gol terbaik MINGGU tu. dah rezeki dia skor gol camtu

- apa dosa website tu kat kau sampai nak label 'bangang' tu?

- suka hati ATM la nak offer gaji RM100000 sebulan, tu hak diorang. tapi memang aku mengaku ni berlebih untuk pemain umur 17 tahun

-training Nazmi takkan seganas pemain-pemain senior, Sathia tahu macam mana nak jaga pemain

- ATM nak bagi gaji tu

- dah OKS pilih dia gi Indonesia, memang la SPM tak amik lagi

- dia tak amik pun gaji RM20000 tu

- tu namanya cita-cita, nak ikut jejak Safee Sali

- luar negara maksudnya kat rantau Asia la , tak pun kelab kecil kat Eropah. bukannya dia target sampai ke Barca tu

- orang panggil Nazmi 'Kaka' sebab muka dia la. research dulu bro!

- takde sapa panggil Park Ji-Sung 'Kaka' sebab cara main memang jauh beza. Ji is Ji, Kaka is Kaka, Nazmi is Nazmi

- kalau dia tak tahu main bola masakan OKS panggil dia masuk team U23

- perempuan tu no komen. diorang tengok muka je

- memang la takde sapa letak muka 'Tami Arasu' sebab dia tak wujud. Thamil Arasu ada la

- mana tau, mungkin ada perempuan bangsa India letak muka Thamil Arasu jadi profile pic dia? kat Malaysia ni bukan Melayu je layan bola tempatan

- lagi sekali, tu pandangan kau. pandangan aku, dia ada potensi

- kenapa kau nak samakan dia dengan Fakri? 2 different types of players, kau nak bandingkan

- Zaquan mana pernah ada skandal, dia nak kahwin artis pun semua dah tahu la. takde gosip sebelum tu. Aidil dengan Apek ada gosip pun prestasi top lagi

- mana kau tahu Nazmi ni akan hancur bila jumpa perempuan? ada pengalaman ke?

macam mana bola sepak Malaysia nak maju. bila ada pemain nak meningkat, mesti ada orang dengki. zaman Mokhtar Dahari pun dah ada orang camni. lepas tu tertanya-tanya kenapa rangking Malaysia tak naik. tak sedar yang diorang yang hancurkan mentaliti pemain ni sebenarnya

rafney87 - layan Bon Jovi lagi elok

der hiatus

safe to say I'm on a little hiatus now due to SPM

I promise to update this more often after it's all over, coz we're all gonna fill up our cameras' memory cards with pics

who knows, this could be the last time we'll be seeing each other until the results day

for now, enjoy these wallpapers I made to celebrate our triumph in the SEA Games

Misi Kelepot

bungkus je la jersi dengan misi ni, tak ke mana pun. koba je lebih 'Misi 33', siap ada jersey launch lagi, tapi kalah gak

So9 Exclusive : Api Kemarahan Tok Mat

Harga tiket final Piala Malaysia 2011 telah ditetapkan pada RM50, dan keputusan ini telah menimbulkan kemarahan para peminat Negeri Sembilan dan Terengganu. Presiden PBNS/MB Negeri Sembilan, DSU Mohamad Hassan juga marah terhadap tindakan tersebut. Kami di ‘State of Nine’ membayangkan lawatan Tok Mat ke Jawatankuasa Pertandingan Tempatan FAM berjalan seperti ini...

Mohamad : Oi Midin! Meh sini jap!

Hamidin : Apa hal lak ni...Azudin, tolong tengok siapa tu

Azudin : Alamak, tu Mohamad Hassan la!

Hamidin : Siapa?

Azudin : Presiden PBNS la bro

Hamidin : PB...NS? Apa tu?

Azudin : Kau ingat Liga Malaysia ni ada Selangor je ke? Aku pun hardcore gak tapi takde la sampai tak tahu team lain

Hamidin : Diam la kau. Suruh dia masuk

Mohamad : Midin! Aku nak tahu satu ni je. Kenapa bila kau naikkan harga tiket, kau libatkan PBNS dengan PBSNT? Kitorang takde kena-mengena pun pasal naik harga tiket tu

Hamidin : Apa lak takde kena-mengena? Korang dah ada hantar wakil hari tu kan?

Mohamad : Siapa lak nama diorang tu?

Hamidin : Err...Hazudin dengan Amidin. Takde pertalian darah antara kitorang

Mohamad : Mengarut benar la. Aku dah kira-kira, PBNS rugi sebab nak tanggung kos RM20 untuk setiap tiket. Ingat kitorang semua bodoh ke apa? Kitorang tahu la yang naik RM50 tu sebab nak tanggung pembiayaan 'Misi 33' korang tu untuk tahun depan

Hamidin : Kau jangan nak tuduh bukan-bukan. Kalau tak puas hati sangat, boikot je la final tu nanti. Ni kan negara demokrasi, korang buat je la apa yang korang nak

Mohamad : Camtu lak...ok, kau yang paksa aku ni. Mario!

Hamidin : Mario mana lak ni?

Mohamad : Balotelli. Aku nak dia ajar korang cukup-cukup!

Hamidin : Apa? Balotelli? Tolong jangan! Ok, ok, aku tak libatkan persatuan korang berdua lagi. Tapi jangan panggil dia tu!

Balotelli : Too late. I've already parked my Maserati in your bedroom. And your kitchen is on fire too, thanks  to those fireworks I set off. The fire may spread to your secret money room as well

Hamidin : (menangis)

Mohamad : That's enough Mario, I think he's learnt his lesson. Now stop torturing him

Balotelli : Then you might not wanna hear the part where I drove his cars into female prisons in Italy 

So9 Exclusive : Komplot Menaikkan Harga Tiket

Harga tiket final Piala Malaysia 2011 telah ditetapkan pada RM50, dan keputusan ini telah menimbulkan kemarahan para peminat Negeri Sembilan dan Terengganu. Kami di ‘State of Nine’ membayangkan mesyuarat Jawatankuasa FAM berjalan seperti ini...

Hamidin : Nampaknya ‘Misi 33’ Selangor dah gagal

Azudin : Teruk betul la. Kita dah ubah venue final dari Bukit Jalil ke Shah Alam pun boleh kalah lagi ke?

Hamidin : Ini tak boleh jadi. Macam mana kita nak balas dendam?

Azudin : Kita gantung Negeri Sembilan dengan Terengganu selama 6 bulan nak?

Hamidin : Tak boleh, obvious sangat tu. Aha! Apa kata kita naikkan harga tiket jadi RM50?

Azudin : Tak ke fans marah nanti?

Hamidin : Biarlah diorang marah. FAM is Selangor and Selangor is FAM

Azudin : Betul tu. Tapi apa kita nak bagitau media nanti?

Hamidin : Cakap je la untuk baiki stadium, jaga keselamatan peminat dan nak elakkan penjualan tiket haram. Media ni senang je nak kena pancing. Lagipun media nanti akan pengaruh peminat semua

Azudin : Tapi bukan ke nanti peminat komplot kat internet?

Hamidin : Kau ingat aku bodoh ke? Internet tu kan mitos je

Azudin : ...

Hamidin : Dah, sudah, sudah! Tiket final RM50. Harga sebenar RM20 je, yang lagi RM30 tu masuk kantung FAS untuk jayakan ‘Misi 33’ musim depan. Jangan bagi Annuar tahu sudah. Dia marah nanti kita jugak susah. Dah la gaji si Kezman ni mahal gila

Azudin : Kalau takde siapa beli tiket?

Hamidin : Gantung je la FA dua-dua negeri selama 5 tahun. Macam tak biasa buat je

Azudin : Wokey bos! Majulah Selangor untuk negara!

Keterbukaan Rumah

white chocolate milkshake

bila raya ni, memang bahagian yang aku paling suka bila kawan-kawan datang rumah/gi rumah kawan. jadi cara paling senang aku nak dapatkan maximum attendance ialah buat rumah terbuka

bila buat rumah terbuka ni senang sikit nak prepare, takde la diorang datang mengejut. bayangkan kalau aku tengah tidur, rumah bersepah, jap lagi ada orang call, kata "5 minit lagi kitorang sampai rumah kau". memang tak sempat la nak sediakan apa-apa

anyway, ni dia gambar-gambar yang diambil masa rumah terbuka aku Jumaat lepas

tak habis-habis nak photobomb

2? apakah itu skor yang memihak kepada Man United malam ni?

 Farid bajet hensem, Syafiq lak control macho

masing-masing dengan perangai pelik diorang

 ARRRGHHHHH!!! hantu mana lak kat kanan gambar tu?

kenapa lak la gambar ni blur

 hidup All-Blacks!!! oh, and my best friends

kepada yang tak dapat datang, takpe la sebab korang ada benda yang tak dapat dielakkan. rilek la, bukannya aku nak rembat korang pun *sharpening Altair's sword*

Merdekaraya 2011 (sponsored by Felipe Massa)

siapa bilang warga Georgians tak patriotik, takde semangat kemerdekaan, tiada jiwa Malaysia? (sori Jamal :p)

 inilah barisan kita, yang ikhlas berjuang...

 semangat kami takkan tergugat

 long-range snap...ingat aku tak nampak korang ke? :p

 takyah cover la zim, ingat aku tak tau ke kau sorang dah balun kek secret recipe tu?

 this was truly an honour. terima kasih cikgu!

kuih raya yang paling amat tersusah sekali nak dibukak

serbu jangan tak serbu!

 1Malaysia in action. we've always been

 gaduh-gaduh dalam kelas tapi kawan-kawan gak

 Amalina, kamera sini la...

 Selamat Merdekaraya dari kelas 5 Muzaffar (gambar Aezack)

sejujurnya, aku akan rindu suasana ni semua. dapat celebrate Merdeka + raya dengan kawan-kawan, makan-makan semua, memang tak boleh nak diciplak kat mana-mana tempat. I had fun, my friends had fun, the teachers had fun, everyone had fun. bila lagi nak tengok budak-budak semua berwarna-warni kat sekolah?

dan ya, aku memang seronok dapat pakai baju Melayu kat sekolah. aku suka tengok diorang semua pakai baju Melayu diorang. aku seronok tengok satu sekolah pakai pakaian tradisional. and we have lives. good ones, in fact. so eat your words, Matthew 

9/11 - My Take

for some reason, after reading 'Days of Future Past', I can't help but link it with 9/11

'Days of Future Past' is a storyline in 'The Uncanny X-Men' back in the 80s. in this storyline, mutants became hated by Americans after The Brotherhood of Evil Mutants killed Senator Kelly. mutants were shunned, rounded up and virtually wiped out in the storyline. the Sentinels (mutant-terminating robots) wiped out the mutants, and even superheroes like Spider-Man, Iron Man and the Fantastic Four

now compare this to 9/11. terrorists attack America. these terrorists happen to be Muslims. Americans hate Muslims now (well, most of them). Muslims are now being prejudiced against because of the actions of radical idiots who don't represent true Islam. Muslims are being discriminated in America, just like the mutants in 'Days of Future Past'

the actions of al-Qaeda are unfair since they do not portray what Islam really is all about : peace and tolerance. they are unfair to humanity who crave for peace and harmony. they are unfair to Muslims who practice the real teachings of Muhammad and the Quran, which are peaceful and non-violent

I also believe it's time Americans open their eyes and see what Islam is really about, not just the media-distorted views. they only stick to the belief that Muslims = terrorists. but do they do any research? do they look deep into it? do they look at other Muslim countries that were not involved in the attacks? of course not. patriotism is one thing, but to be blinded by it is pure stupidity. and they wonder why people hate them

Marvel have predicted these events way back in the 80s. the people may be different but the end result is the same : discrimination and prejudice

The Prancing Horse

 totally random

Plain White Robes - Rhythm of Kill

the Plain White Robes - Luigi (bass), Alessandro (drums), Ezio (lead singer, guitar), Gianluigi (guitar), Giuseppe (bass)

I am stuck in the house
He begs me not to kill him
Says, "Boy, I got a wife and 3 kids"
I told him, "Shut up you stupid Templar
We are gonna win the war
We'll fight till your blood spills
As the world turns to the rhythm of kill"

We may only have one shot
But till the guards come, you're dead
All dead
Aim the crossbow low
And sway to the rhythm of kill

My sword swings like an axe
Juiced up way to the max
A beautiful death rattle from you
You remind me of that dead Jew
That blocked my way to the park
He fell down like Busquests
The moment my sword met his face

We may only have one shot
But till the guards come, you're dead
All dead
Aim the crossbow low
And sway to the rhythm of kill

When the moon is low
I chase you in slow motion
And all your pain will subside
All your blood will dry

And long after I've gone
Desmond will keep me going on
And I live on in his mind
And drive him off the wall sometimes

We may only have one shot
But till the guards come, you're dead
All dead
Aim the crossbow low
And sway to the rhythm of kill
Aim the crossbow low
And sway to the rhythm of kill
Yeah, sway to the rhythm of kill  

(Requescat in Pace) 

Amukan Pengawas di Sekolah

SEREMBAN, 15 Julai - Gara-gara tidak puas hati kerana tidak menjadi pengawas lagi, beberapa orang pengawas di sekolah terkenal di bandar ini telah membakar beberapa bahagian sekolah tersebut.


Kejadian tersebut dipercayai berlaku pada jam 10.30 malam, tatkala pak guard sedang nyeyak tidur di pos kawalannya. Dipercayai bahawa beberapa orang bekas pengawas ini menyalakan api yang besar ketika kem pemimpin pelajar sekolah ini sedang berlangsung untuk menunjukkan ketidakpuasan hati mereka apabila terpaksa meletakkan jawatan pada minggu hadapan.


Salah seorang daripada mereka, yang hanya mahu dikenali sebagai Wan, berkata "Sebelum ini adalah menjadi cita-cita saya untuk menjadi ketua pemimpin pelajar, dan alhamdulillah saya diberikan amanah tersebut pada tahun lalu. Namun belum genap setahun pun, saya dipaksa meletakkan jawatan saya. Mana adil!", sebelum menyatakan sesuatu mengenai polisi perpindahan pemain Arsene Wenger.


Beberapa orang bekas pengawas kemudiannya melakukan rusuhan di kolam renang. Mereka kemudiannya mengisi kolam itu dengan air, atas alasan untuk menyukarkan mereka yang tidak pandai berenang sekembalinya mereka ke sekolah.


Satu blok sekolah tersebut telah hangus dijilat api sehingga terpaksa dicat semula. Salah seorang guru berkata "Kami terpaksa membelanjakan wang yang banyak untuk mengecat semula blok ini. Salah kami juga kerana kami tidak sedar tempoh mereka menjadi pengawas ialah selama 363 hari sahaja. Namun, mengapakah mereka harus menjadikan rumput di hadapan kiosk itu sebagai mangsa juga? Dahulu di situ penuh rumput, sekarang tinggal batu kerikil sahaja", sebelum diberitahu bahawa rumput itu sebenarnya telah dimakan seekor lembu yang memakai cermin mata dan menggelarkan dirinya sebagai 'Legend F5'.


gambar kredit kepada Nur Amalina, diambil tanpa kebenaran. get well soon!